A heavy pre-Christmas week

Wow, I didn’t realise how long I was gone. I don’t even remember the time I posted my last entry. So let’s talk about Saturday.

Saturday morning I was supposed to deliver the photos to my contact. But as I later realised, you should never wait until the last day to print anything. The problem was that she told me she would notify me if there were any new orders after their rehearsal on Friday night, and by the time she did, it was too late to go print the photos. That ended with me running up and down the city the next morning trying to get the earliest photo printer I could find, which resulted to be the worst service you could ever imagine. I handed them my flash drive with one simple enough instruction: print four of this. They, showing the efficiency of any Mexican corporation, told me that it would be done in an hour (you know, because we’re in 1985). So I left, spent some time with a friend and exactly 61 minutes later I showed up back at the store. The lady asked for my receipt and with the biggest and most hypocrite smile she could give she said the six words a Mexican fears the most:

“I’ll have it in five minutes.”

This led to me wandering around the store for half an hour and always looking at the printer. And I’m talking about something that happened at 10 a.m., too early for a rush hour. Finally they printed my pictures; it took them exactly forty seconds and then they called me. I was in a hurry so pushing that I made my second mistake: I did not check the pictures in the store. I ran like crazy to my encounter point to (unsurprisingly) find out that my contact was gone. I texted her to apologise and we got another appointment (next Thursday).

It was a good thing, though, because when I got home I saw the pictures: they somehow edited them to make it look like a celestial choir (something not too appealing if the uniform is bright green) and they cropped half a woman out of the picture. Half a woman. Not even a full woman, half of her; in the most obviously wrong situation you can get on a business dedicated exclusively to print photos. And it wasn’t like they had no choice to make it fit; on the other side of it there was a huge space that I didn’t crop specifically for that possibility. And this woman was one of the ones that were paying so there was no way I could ever hand her that piece of garbage and pretend to get money in exchange. And that’s how I learnt to never trust people whose business should have died with the arrival of PCs.

Later that day I got something that cheered me up:  one of my church’s groups decided to play one of my scripts for Christmas and let me direct it. Well, it was not exactly a decision, it was more like a “you can write and we’re desperate, please do a script” thing. So during the last few days I have been directing it; the play is called “All I want for Christmas is you” and it’s about a little girl who misses his dad, who works in the oil industry and they never see each other. It’s not my best work, but they thought it was cute. Maybe I translate it and post it here later. I didn’t do it so much for the art as I did it for social criticism; where I live everyone’s dream is to work on the oil industry because they pay a lot. Nobody seems to care about the other factors; they are all “money, money, money” and although I’m not particularly against of that for a single person (everyone should live their lives the way they want) I do hate it when there’s a family involved. Most of my friends in high school were children of oil workers, and I saw the consequences: lack of family time, self-esteem issues and families breaking apart for infidelity or alcoholism (two conducts encouraged by fellow oil workers in their social groups). I had a friend who was 16 years old and she was already corrupted: all she could think of was working and making money. She didn’t even have plans for that money, I asked her several times and she never gave me a straight answer. And she was always worried about her look; I mean, it’s Ok if you do it for yourself, like Curlz, but this friend did it to find a good husband. Not a loving husband, a good one. And when I asked her what are the qualities of a good husband the first thing she said was “a good job in a directive charge”. I always felt sad about her and did all I could to make her see things differently, but I don’t think it worked. And that’s the main reason of my hate against the oil industry: it makes people put money over happiness. So I wrote the play in a way that it could show this easily for children and adults. Maybe it won’t do much, but if I touch one heart that will be enough for me. One heart.

And about the rest of the week I’ll be quick because there was nothing really interesting and I don’t feel like writing much tonight anyway.

  • Sunday my dad’s choir sang on an event and I participated with them. It was nice; I hadn’t done it since last Christmas. I like being in a choir, I just hate the pressure everyone puts on my to follow my father’s steps and become a musician. Yes, I like music, yes, I’m good at music, yes, I have an amazing hearing and rhythm (although I can’t dance to save my life) but no, I don’t want to live of it. My passion is books and I’m getting tired of everyone telling me to study music. I got to the point where I live with two music teachers and I can hardly read a music sheet, because I don’t want to learn it in a professional way. I don’t even play an instrument, and I know the basis of piano, guitar and flute. But I don’t want to be my father; I want to be treated like an individual person.
  • Also on Sunday, but morning: I don’t think I have told this here, but I teach a little bible class to nine-year-olds in my church, and two of them told me they wanted to participate in the Christmas talent show, so I am now practicing a carol with them. I hope it goes fine; I love these kids, and they really put a lot of effort, but they have never received any musical instruction in their lives and I’m not sure I can prepare them for Wednesday. I will do my best and hope that their cuteness helps us.
  • Monday and Wednesday I rehearsed my play with the team and I think it will be fine. I need to download the special effects, though, because I forgot to give the task to someone else and I wouldn’t trust them anyway. I think I’ll do that tomorrow.
  • Tuesday I went out to get some stuff and when I was coming back I found a friend’s girlfriend. She told me she was going to the dentist and my friend would meet her there, and she asked me if I would want to join her, so I said yes and I got to hang out with one of the few high school friends I keep. It was great; I should go see him more often. But especially I love seeing them together; they are the perfect couple. They went through a lot to be together and they are certain of their marriage someday; they even chose me to be the best man in their wedding. I hope one day I can have something like what they have.
  • And finally, today I delivered the pictures that caused me so much trouble. It was a huge relief and I don’t think I will repeat it, but I think I learnt from it.

 

And that’s what kept me busy all these days. I probably will stay that way until Christmas, but I will post something interesting, you’ll see. The only thing that worries me is that these few days I have been feeling depressed; I don’t want to go anywhere and I often find myself daydreaming about unpleasing scenarios involving Whovie, Curlz or a certain person I really hate. I hope it leaves soon; I need to be great for the talent show. I have to make them think, that is my purpose. Besides, everyone has suicidal thoughts every once in a while, right? It comes and goes; I just have to keep myself distracted. It’s weird, these mood changes. The curious part is it always happens when everything is great in my life. I should talk to someone about it, but I don’t trust psychologists. I don’t like the idea of someone knowing everything about me. I mean, I’m doing that right now but it’s not the same. My identity is relatively safe and I don’t think anyone will bother to track me, especially since the blog has like three readers. But having to tell my life to someone who knows who I am, where I study and who do I spend time with is terrifying.

Well, I’m talking nonsense now so that means is time to sleep. The three things I learnt this week are:

1.- If you ever come to Mexico never get your photos on a Contino store. They stink.

2.- I found the perfect model of love in a friend and his girlfriend. I want to have a relationship like theirs someday.

3.- Team Fortress 2 update: I’m a good Heavy/Soldier, terrible Engineer/Spy. I might join online gaming soon, if my connection decides to keep stable.

 

Peace,

Écrivain

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